Are you willing to deal with infidelity?

infidelityThough we are divided on how we perceive infidelity, the majority of us consider it a deal-breaker. People from this school of thought consider infidelity the major reason for relationship breakdowns and are unwilling to put up with it, even if it involves a messy divorce, unimaginable pain, alimony and custody issues. However, people on the other side of the fence are willing to look at the situation as an eye opener, use it as a wakeup call to figure what is wrong in the relationship and fix it. Which is the right approach? Is infidelity indeed the end of the road for a marriage or is there any room for forgiveness? As the debate rages on, this is what a few people had to say:

Forgive it

“I have always believed that just as it takes two to make a marriage work; it takes two to break it too. Though the same cannot be said about pathological cheaters, those who stray for the first time do so because of some deep-seated unhappiness with the marriage. When my wife had an affair, I asked myself, ‘Did I give her all that she was seeking? Did I drive her into it?’ Ask yourself those questions, the answers might surprise you. In our case, we both recognised our faults and dived head along into recovery mode. It has been a year since we renewed our vows in our hearts and I can proudly say that we have never been happier before. There is just no room for anyone else in our lives anymore.” – David Bevan, 45

No Mercy

“I have been married to my husband for six years now. In these six years, we have been on a ride through hell and back. From financial troubles to getting in and out of rehab, I have backed him through everything. To be cheated after all the sacrifices I have made felt like a hard blow, like a knockout punch. I feel emotionally bereft. Now every time I see his face, there are questions swimming in my mind. Forget loving him, I can never even look at him in the same light. I know I will be sick with suspicion every time his cell phone rings late in the night or something small like that and I am unwilling to put myself through such torture. It’s over.”  – Grace Edwards, 38

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