Love – no, I won’t bother you with my take on the most famously infamous word that has continuously eluded a proper definition. When great thinkers and philosophers haven’t been able to come up with a way of describing this feeling that they all agree on, I should definitely keep away from the theorising.
Rather, I’d jump straight to the end of it.
Love, though not always, comes with an expiry date. Maybe that’s not fair to say. Maybe it is the loving relationships that come with an expiry date. Whatever it is, if you are in love, there are high chances of you ending up heartbroken. That isn’t to say you will be miserable forever or won’t find love again. But the time it takes to heal is often the hardest thing we have to go through.
Is there a silver lining to heartbreak? There sure is! Few other life experiences teach hard-hitting life lessons better than heartbreak does. Here are the 3 good things you learn from love falling apart –
- Words hurt the most – Remember your first relationship? The one that started so innocently back in those days when stress related to jobs, savings, assets etc were not even in the distant horizon? Isn’t it sad that despite many beautiful experiences, it is the nasty exchanges that remain etched in memory? Try thinking of the compliments he paid and the accusations he made. Which do you remember more vividly? Unfortunately, scathing words said in moments of anger find refuge in the deepest corners of our psyches and rear their heads in our most low, insecure moments. Long after the apologies, the words continue to pinch, making sceptics of us all. Choose your words well.
- Never forsake your personal goals – Easier said than done, you think? Oh, most definitely. In an ideal relationship, you will continue to work towards your goals. Ideally, having a partner should make goal achievement easier as there is a supportive someone to walk next to you, hold you when you fumble and egg you on. However, reality is different. That special someone comes with his/her own dreams and baggage. Instead of both parties running parallel, paths merge and get knotted, leading to complications. And what’s the first thing we do to ease out the creases? We give up on our goals to accommodate our partners. A mistake.
- It actually will be okay and you will find love again – When you have just broken up, those words perhaps seem the most hollow and unrealistic to you. How can it ever be okay when you have lost your soul mate, you ask through tears. Despite surviving heartbreaks in the past, a fresh one always makes us feel (momentarily) that this is IT, that the cloud of misery and dejection that has engulfed you this time will never lift, that a dark, dank tunnel you are walking through will never lead you towards light. However, it will. No matter how absurd it seems, know it in your heart that you will actually be over this. Believe it or not, you will find love again.